Not even self-confessed bookworm Jonathan Spector could have dreamt up the plot of Tuesday's 4-0 Carling Cup quarter-final win against Manchester United.
Not only did the US international score twice against the club that brought him to England as a 16-year-old, but those goals were his first for West Ham United - on his 97th appearance.
Factor in that Spector was appearing for the first time in a new defensive midfield role and the storyline takes on fantasy proportions.
"I don't think too many people were expecting that!" the 24-year-old told WHUTV with a smile.
"I was delighted with the result, most importantly, because we played really well. It was a great performance and a bit of a bonus getting the two goals."
Spector's goals were his first at senior level in 158 appearances for the United States, Manchester United, Charlton Athletic and West Ham.
Both were laid on by Victor Obinna, who enjoyed a memorable night of his own by chalking up assists for all four Hammers goals.
"I think I have Victor to thank for both of them. He put a great ball in for the header and for the second one he went for the shot and nicked it a little bit and I was just there to pick up the pieces.
"I was a bit fortunate but it worked out great!"
The Chicago-born player has spent the vast majority of his career in defence - either as a full-back or centre-back - but has recently been training in a defensive midfield role at Chadwell Heath.
The move paid immediate dividends against his old club.
"It was nice to have a bit more freedom. I think if I had been playing with any of the other central midfielders that we have [other than partner Radoslav Kovac], they probably would have been a bit more advanced than me.
"It was good playing with Kova. He's a great player and he helped me out a lot."
Spector has enjoyed some big moments in his career, making his Manchester United debut in the Community Shield at Wembley, helping the Hammers stave off relegation at Old Trafford and winning the CONCACAF Gold Cup in his home city of Chicago in 2007, as well as helping the US to defeat Spain at the 2009 FIFA Confederations Cup.
Tuesday's events have joined those matches in the American's own personal hall of fame.
"I suppose for me personally that was up there. It was also a great team performance as well.
"The win at the weekend against Wigan was probably bigger for us, but hopefully we can continue on this track and push on from here.
"It's been a bit frustrating and disappointing but at the same time you have to wait for your chance and it came on Tuesday."